Director: Tommy Wirkol
My only defence for watching this is it’s Halloween. Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters starts with the traditional Hansel & Gretel story: abandoned siblings, tasty candy house, a child cooking witch, and ultimately witchicide. From there, the director takes a pinch of each of the popular teen genres in attempt to film something an audience will pay to see. There’s a sexy bad witch, a sexy good witch, sexy witch hunting siblings, trendy skin-tight leather outfits, really dark sets, blood, exploding bodies, steampunk like weapons, martial arts and trolls. Whew, oh yeah, swear words, a bare witch backside, a nipple flash, the torturing of captive witches, exploding peasants, sheriff’s men getting squashed and lots and lots of stunt people.
Don’t worry there is a story, something about finding eleven children that have disappeared from the village or something like that. If you want to see dead witches killed in multiple gory ways then this is the movie for you. Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters can best be summed up by the words of Hansel himself, “Never walk into a house made of candy”, and “the only good witch is a dead witch”.